love portrait

Love

“Never be afraid to be in love. It is the place where your heart and your soul will find solace.” -Debasish Mridha

It takes a brave soul to love again after heartbreak. But it’s a beautiful feeling to feel your heart has awaken again from its deep, healing, rest. Something in me won’t let me stop loving, even after being hurt repeatedly. I view each experience as a lesson, a stepping stone in my growth. Each time I find myself emotionally connecting with another human, my mind screams with logic to be weary, but still my heart wins. I know I may very well get hurt each and every time. But I know that if I don’t, I won’t grow, and I also know that one day it won’t happen. I won’t get hurt. And I’ll wake up one day and realize that he never left, that we’ve built a life together with love and respect as it’s foundation. 

Call me a hopeless romantic, but I just have a feeling in my gut that if I don’t keep that door open to love, and the possibility of loss, then life will be incredibly dark. I’m a firm believer that if you don’t risk anything then you risk everything. Being vulnerable is the essence of love. There is no love without vulnerability, and that means we open ourselves to the possibility of getting hurt.

I have encountered so many humans that take their first experience with love, loss, and pain as the truth for all intimate relationships. They put up walls around their heart so sturdy and tall that it’ll take a bulldozer to get to them.. and i gotta tell ya.. conscious people don’t want to deal with that. The logic behind it is protection.. that if someone wants them bad enough they’ll try harder… but that’s not reality. The reality is those people are still broken, and the only people who will try to knock down that wall is also going to be broken, (and crazy enough to believe they’ll succeed in knocking it down). Nobody can knock down a wall around a heart except the person who built it.

And so, those who build walls perpetuate the negative cycle, continuously proving their conclusion right that everyone will hurt them. I refuse to do this. When I realized how this works, I knew I’d never be able to build a wall again. And so, I began to heal. Healing begins with self-love. I began to heal from heartbreak by loving myself. I began to make time for myself. I began to listen to my heart, my intuition. I began to take care of myself, show my body love and respect. I began to heal my mind, my body, my spirit, my heart. I got clear about what I want in life and what I want in a partner, and with each step I take I’m closer and closer to what I truly want.

Although I may still get hurt, I am open to the possibility of love, and I am open to the lessons and growth every experience provides. All the while continuously loving myself above all else, never forgetting to make time for me. I am constantly learning, growing, healing, and loving.

 

Written by: Heather Robinson

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